“Where are you from?”

If you’re raising a child who has lived in more than one country, you’ve probably seen that familiar pause before they answer. They hesitate, maybe glance at you, and then give a complicated story instead of a simple answer: “Well, I was born in London, but we lived in Dubai for five years, and now we’re in Singapore…so, I guess…everywhere?”

If this sounds familiar, you’re raising a Third-Culture Kid (TCK). With nearly 31 million children growing up abroad with expatriate or globally mobile parents, this lifestyle is becoming more common than ever. But along with the rich, exciting life that TCKs enjoy, there are also hidden emotional challenges that parents must navigate.

This post is for you, the parents juggling suitcases, school applications, and heartfelt goodbyes. Let’s talk about what every parent of a TCK needs to know, and how you can help your child thrive.

The Beautiful (and Complicated) Life of TCKs

Let’s start with the good news.

Children who grow up between cultures tend to develop amazing global skills:

• Cultural empathy and open-mindedness (they can make friends from anywhere!)
  
• Bilingual or multilingual abilities
  
• Adaptability and creativity, qualities that help them shine in school and future careers
  
• A strong sense of being a “global citizen”
  

Research even shows that 95% of TCKs attend college, and nearly 30% earn advanced degrees, far above average.

But (and this is the part we don’t talk about enough), growing up between worlds isn’t always easy.

The Hidden Struggles TCKs Face

Frequent moves mean constant goodbyes. Many TCKs describe feeling like they “belong everywhere and nowhere” and when they return to their “home” country, they often experience reverse culture shock, feeling like strangers in a place that’s supposed to be familiar.

The research is sobering:

• 21% of TCKs report high levels of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), almost double the U.S. average
  
• Rates of emotional neglect (39%) and abuse (44%) are significantly higher than in non-mobile children
  
• Around 40% of TCKs drop out of their first year of college, often due to social adjustment issues
  

If you’ve ever worried whether your child will feel “rootless” or whether all these moves are too much for them, you’re not overthinking it. The emotional toll is real, but the good news is parents can make a huge difference.

What Parents Can Do: Practical Tips That Work

Parenting a TCK is different, but it’s not impossible. Research highlights specific strategies that help TCKs develop resilience and a healthy sense of identity. Here’s what works best:

1. Be Their “Home Base”

No matter how many countries you live in, you are their constant. Create family routines that stay the same everywhere you move, Friday pizza nights, bedtime stories, or morning walks. Psychologists call this a “secure attachment,” and it’s the strongest protective factor for TCKs facing change.

2. Talk About the Hard Stuff

Encourage your child to talk about their feelings, especially before and after moves. Ask questions like, “What will you miss the most about this place?” or “What are you nervous about in the new school?” One simple tool that TCK counselors recommend is the “Zones of Regulation” a color-coded way to help kids label emotions like sadness, worry, or excitement.

3. Celebrate Both Cultures

TCKs often feel “in between,” so help them connect with all parts of their identity.

• Celebrate passport-country traditions (even quirky ones, yes, National Spaghetti Day counts!).
  
• Learn local customs and try new foods together.
  
• Display photos, flags, or souvenirs from past homes to show that every place is part of their story.
  

4. Build a Community of Other TCKs

Nothing helps a TCK feel “normal” like being around other kids who get it. Expat clubs, international school events, or even online TCK communities can help them build friendships with peers who share their lifestyle.

5. Prepare for Goodbyes (and Hellos)

Don’t skip the goodbyes, rituals help kids process loss. Create a “farewell tradition,” like making a photo album, writing letters to friends, or leaving a small gift behind in each place. When arriving in a new country, help them personalize their new room or choose a first-day adventure to look forward to.

What This Really Means for You (and Your Child)

Parenting a TCK is a balancing act. You’re giving your child an extraordinary gift, a worldview most adults envy, but you’re also asking them to say a lot of goodbyes along the way.

That’s okay because, with your love and support, your child can thrive. Research consistently shows that when TCKs have strong family bonds and a space to process their emotions, they grow into remarkably resilient, empathetic adults.

So the next time someone asks your child, “Where are you from?” and they pause before answering, smile. That pause means they have a life story full of adventure, cultures, and friendships all over the world.

And thanks to you, they’ll also have something even better, a home in their heart, wherever they go.

Quick Parent Checklist: TCK Survival Guide

✔ Keep family routines stable (home is where YOU are)

✔ Talk about feelings, even the hard ones

✔ Celebrate all cultures they belong to

✔ Build friendships with other TCKs

✔ Help them say goodbyes, and look forward to new hellos